The Chameleon Effect

Lt. John Blanchard was in New York City at Grand Central Station, and he looked up at the big clock. It said five till six. His heart was racing. At exatly six o'clock he was going to meet the girl whom he thought he was in love with, but had never met. 
This is what happened... He had been in Florida for pilot training during WWII, and while he was there he happened to go to a library and check out a book. As he flipped through the pages, he noticed that someone had made noted in the margins. Reading the insightful observations in beautiful handwriting, he said to himself, "I would love to meet whoever wrote these notes -- they seem so kind, gentle, and wise."
He looked in the front of the book and saw a name, Harlyss Maynell, New York City. He decided to try to find her. With the help of a New York City phone book, he found her address and wrote her a letter. The day after he wrote her, he was shipped back overseas to fight in the war.
 
Surprisingly, Harlyss answered John's letter. They soon began to correspond back and forth throughout the war. "Her letters were just like the marvelous notes she had written in that book," John recalled. "She was so conforting and so helping." One time John had confessed in a letter that he had been scared to death when they flew over Germany. Harlyss had encouraged him, "All brave men are afraid at times. Next time you are afraid, just say 'Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for Thou art with me.'"
As they continued to write, John began to realize that he was having romantic feelings toward Harlyss. He wrote, "Send me a picture," and she replied, "No, I won't. Relationships are NOT built on what people look like." Still, he was intrigued by her and longed to meet her in person. Finally the day came when he was to return to the States on leave. He mentioned in one of his letters that he was coming home and would like to take her to dinner. She had arranged to meet him in New York City's Grand Central Station at 6 P.M. under the big clock. "You'll know who I am becuase I'll be wearing a red rose," she told him.
At last the day had come. John waited nervously to finally meet the girl he thought he loved. Here is how John described his first meeting with Harlyss Maynell:
"A young woman was coming toward me, her figure long and slim. She had blonde hair that lay back in curls from her delicate ears. Her eyes were as blue as flowers. Her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in a pale green suit she looked like spring-time come alive!

Excitedly, I started toward her, entirely forgetting to notice that she was NOT wearing a red rose. As I moved her way, she noticed me. A small provocative smile curled her lips.
"Going my way, soldier?" she asked coyly. I took another step closer to her. It was then that I saw... Harlyss Maynell with the red rose in her coat, directly behind the girl in green. My heart sank. She was a woman well past forty. She was plump. She had graying hair tucked under a worn hat. Her thick ankles were thrust into low shoes. The girl in the green suit was walking quickly away. I had to make a choice. Should I follow after the beauty who had just spoken to me? Or stay and face poor Harlyss Maynell?
I made my decision and I did not hesitate. 
Turning toward the woman, I smiled. Even as I began to speak, I felt choked by bitter disappointment. "You must be Miss Maynell," I said, extending my hand. "I'm so glad you could meet me. Will you join me for dinner?" The older woman's face then broadened into a smile. "I don't know what this is all about, son," she replied, "but you know that young woman in the green suit who just went by? I met her on the train. She begged me to wear this rose in my coat. She said that if you should ask me to dinner, to tell you she's waiting for you in that big restaurant across the street. She said it was some kind of a test."



There are so many morals that can be taken away from this story.
1 Do we base our feelings off of appearances?
2. How many times have we passed up a friendship simply because of how a person looked?
3. While this story exemplified relationships, why should it be any different in everyday life?
4. Do you put your personal pleasure above commitments to others? 

No one has the perfect appearance, but God created you to be you! You have a unique personality, be yourself. If people cannot accept us for who we are, then they are not worth having in our lives. It doesn't matter if you wear the latest trends, or the most expensive brands of clothing. Too often we base our opinions and feelings off of how a person looks. Especially in relationships - as you age, appearance is going to change. The things that really matter will be compatibility, companionship, friendship, and love.


Dig deeper than the surface. Ask questions. Get to know who someone really is - even if they don't look exactly like the people you normally are around. One of the things I've learned is not to hold back and to be myself. I think people have the tendency to "become who they hang out with;" its almost as if their personality changes depending on the situation. I like to call it "The Chameleon Effect." This often results in a person seeming like they're "two-faced."


If someone won't like you for who you really are, are they worth having in your life to begin with?

Date A Girl Who Reads

I found this quote - not sure who it is by but I stole it.

"If you find a girl who reads, keep her close.
When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are. Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone.
If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads."



I was laughing pretty hard as I read this for the first time, and then realized some parts of it are actually true - to an extent. The whole finding her up at 2am clutching a book deal... has me written all over it. Except I don't cry over books. In my case... you'd probably find me up at 2am trying to finish a suspense or mystery... and scare the living daylights out of me when you come in. With romance books, what guy wants a girl that doesn't present a challenge? If a girl is really easily impressed, what is there to keep things exciting? Expectations are a good thing, unless you let them become unrealistic. A girl who knows what she wants a likes can easily have a lot of fun with ideas she gets when reading. Whether it be date ideas, conversation starters, or numerous other things, books (even romance or inspirational novels as they call them now) provide a vast array of possibilities.

During a conversation with a friend the other day, the issue of kids not reading in today's world was brought up. So many of my friends have told me they hate reading. Since I was about 4 years old, when my Nanna was teaching me how to read, I have been able to lose myself in books. Many of the places that I only dream about visiting I have been able to experience through the pages of books. I've learned history of various places, and parts of languages, and accents simply from reading.Kids need to be encouraged to read, the love of reading needs to be cultivated in these kids from an early age. People are missing out on so much simply because they refuse to pick up a book and let themselves enjoy it.

Reading is knowledge. Knowledge keeps life interesting.

Womenspeak - A New Language?

Men don't understand women. Women don't understand men. But do women really understand each other? Not really, Its just one never-ending circle of confusion.


While reading a book called "Female Intelligence" there are some things that stood out to me.
Some of the major comments or innuendos were that men have to be "in touch with their feminine side" and or had to learn a certain "language" to be able to carry on a conversation with a woman. Not the case. In the book, the language of females was called womenspeak. Men needed to learn and understand this language in order to effectively communicate with the women in their lives. However, in reality, this womenspeak language, was in actuality teaching men how to placate women by using key phrases that were memorized as one would learn a script.

C'mon people... is this really how it works in real life? Of course not!

Today, the world has created so many problems for communication -- technology being one of them, but that was discussed in a previous post. There are certain quotes such as this one to the right that cause men to constantly wonder what women are thinking about. Or there's the list of things called the female dictionary such as:

• Nothing, forget it = you better figure out what you did wrong.
• Are you tired? = please don't go to sleep, I love talking to you.
• I'm okay = I'm really not, I want you to hold me and let me cry, but i'm too proud to admit it.
• I just don't care anymore = I still care, but i'm sick of arguing with you.
• I'm cold = give me your sweatshirt.
• Leave me alone = please don't go.
• I love you = tell me you do more.

What on earth are we trying to do to those poor guys? I cannot tell you how many girls, young ladies, women -- choose your noun -- have complained to me that guys or men just do not understand them. Well, maybe the above is a clue as to why they don't. Most guys have a very straight forward thinking mind. As two authors stated in their book, "men are like waffles, women are like spaghetti." In many ways, this is true, most guys do not analyze every single thing that is said or done. They don't interconnect everything that happens and reference to a previous incident like females do. Which is why there are so many problems with communication between men and women in today's world. There are so many different meanings to words or sayings that it has everyone confused! I say everyone needs to start speaking their mind... it might be bad for some, but there'd be less confusion.

There's also the little issue of holding grudges, or pulling out "the file" of past grievances committed and using it as a weapon. Men really don't do that -- something happens, they forget and move on. Women keep these things filed away under lock and key to pull out whenever they need feul for the fire. PROBLEM. What is the deal with women and keeping those things for ammo? Is it the need to win? Or one-up the guy? To make him the bad guy every time something happens? This is not a healthy thing to do in any relationship, let alone a dating relationship or marriage. These things will just cause problems that will escalate into bigger problems.

So, can men and women actually communicate with each other? Yes!! There are some great guys I know who can hold awesome conversations. The difference? There's no hidden agenda, there's no hidden meanings behind the things being said, there's no grudges being held. I'll leave you with some food for thought... A wise person once told me:

 "Say what you mean, and mean what you say. People won't have to wonder so much then."

Under the Armor is a Child

I fell in love with this song in 10th grade. God brought it to my mind this morning.











Lately I've been winning battles left and right
But even winners can get wounded in the fight
People say that I'm amazing
Strong beyond my years
But they don't see inside of me
I'm hiding all the tears
But they don't see inside of me
I'm hiding all the tears

They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while
Cause deep inside this armor
The warrior is a child

Unafraid because His armor is the best
But even soldiers need a quiet place to rest
People say that I'm amazing
Never face retreat
But they don't see the enemies
That lay me at His feet

They don't know that I go running home when i fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and cry for just a while
Cause deep inside this armor
The warrior is a child

They don't know that I go running home when I fall down
They don't know who picks me up when no one is around
I drop my sword and look up for a smile
Cause deep inside this armor
Deep inside this armor
Deep inside this armor
The Warrior is a Child

~Twila Paris~

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wm2W_yCEoaM&feature=related

Becoming You

An excerpt from Last Light by Terri Blackstock:

"Every day of your life you'll have to make decisions about what kind of person you want to be. Its not going to start when you're older. It starts right now. And every time you make a decision to be less than what God wants for you, you're denying yourself some of God's blessings. Its up to you. You can live a life with God's blessings, or just exist with all the consequences of choosing wrong."

Yesterday is gone, tomorrow hasn't come, You are in the present. The decisions you make today will change the outcome of tomorrow. The future starts now.

Little Ones to HIM Belong

This morning, God brought to my mind two very special little boys. Gage and his little brother Aiden are 9 and 7 years old.

Here is their story...

 For the past three years I have watched Gage and Aiden grow older and learn more things about God and the Bible. From summer to summer the changes in them were awesome to see. This particular summer, there were other changes occurring in their lives. After each club at the end of my allotted hour time slot, I always give an invitation or an opening for the kids to talk to me about receiving Christ as their Savior. Of the 16 children that were there, many of them under the age of 5, a few of them had talked to me after club finished. This particular day, I was getting ready to leave, and as I was heading to the door Aiden tugged on my hand and asked to talk to me. Thrilled beyond words, I took him to the corner of the room and began going through the counseling cards (visual cards with questions that we use to engage the children). As we finished the cards, he told me that he wanted to ask Jesus to be his Savior. I was able to pray with him, and when we finished, he looked at me and said "Jesus is always going to be with me, right?" I showed him the verse Hebrews 13:5 where Jesus says "I will never leave thee." The smile on his face was huge.
As Aiden and I were finishing up talking, his brother Gage (9), came over and asked to talk to me too. After Aiden left, I began to talk to Gage. I asked him what he wanted to talk about, and huge tears started to well up in his eyes. He whispered, "my mom is getting re-married, and I don't have a real dad anymore." After talking with him some more, I found out that his parents had gotten divorced, and his mom was getting re-married. He felt like his real dad didn't care about them anymore, he was worried about school, and having a new step-dad. As we were talking, I asked him if he had been listening to the lessons and songs I had taught them all week long. He said yes, and then I asked him if he heard the part during the lessons about asking Jesus to be his Savior. His reply was, "yes, I've been wanting to do that for a long time." I began to take him through the same counseling cards that his brother had just gone through. 15 minutes later, Gage prayed and asked Jesus to be his Savior. Afterward I asked him where Jesus was, and he looked at me with a huge smile and said "In my heart." I asked him how long he was going to stay there, and he said "forever." As we were talking, again about his family situation, he kept bringing up the fact that his dad wasn't going to be there anymore. I was able to talk to him about how God is like our Heavenly father, and even if we don't have a "real" father here on earth, God will always be there to listen to us and take care of us. He asked me if he'd be able to talk to him any time, I showed him Jeremiah 33:3 and explained what that verse meant. He asked if I would pray with him again, and I sat there and listened to this precious 9 year old boy talk to the Heavenly Father that would always be there for him. After he finished he looked at me and said "thank you for telling me about Jesus."

I have always been humbled by the fact that God allows me to minister to these children summer after summer. It is moments like these that remind me why we as Christians need to be ministering to the little ones. Everyone always talks about the 10-40 window, well my passion is the 4-14 window. 90% of Christians, if asked, will say that they received Christ between the ages of 4 and 14. Once a child reaches the age of 15 their minds are set, and beliefs have been established (in most cases). During the most vulnerable years of a persons' life is when they need to hear the Gospel. I am so ready for the challenges awaiting me this coming summer, and the precious little ones that God will bring in to my life once again.

"Even so, it is not the will of the Father, who is in Heaven, that even one of these little ones should perish."
~Matthew 18:14~

Three Words

Don't waste precious time, say those three little words "I love you" every day to the people that mean the world to you. You never know when it will be the last time they hear it.